I was walking at the mall the other day with my son and I suddenly heard “Excuse me.” I was at a mall that I do not normally frequent and I was not expecting to see anyone that I know.
I turned around to see a woman with a questioning look on her face.
“Can you tell me what kind of conditioner you put in your hair?”
I stood there for a second, pondering the fact that she was asking ME about my hair. As you know, I have low self-esteem and I have never thought of myself as beautiful. I am also pretty sure that nobody has ever asked me for recommendation on any kind of hair or beauty products.
I finally answered her and explained to her the Curly Girl Method that I have been using the last few months. She was overjoyed to hear that there was something that she could do about her hair! After we chatted a minute, we started to part ways. She thanked me and as I started walking away, she said “Your hair truly is beautiful.”
While I have gotten a lot of compliments on my hair the last few months since I have started embracing my curls, no one has told me that my hair is beautiful. I didn’t think much about it at the time because I had Jayden with me and I needed to go on about my business. But as I had time later to think back on the moment, it really hit me that someone out there thought that some part of me was beautiful. I know we are not supposed to take pride in our looks. However, the fact that I am working with the curls that God gave me and not trying to change them nor hide them reminds me that He made us all beautiful.
Now, as Beth Moore says, I’m not going to be giving up my makeup or my nail polish or coloring my gray hairs. I am, however, going to continue to find God’s true beauty within myself.
That is my goal this year. Once the kids go back to school, my focus is going to be on ME. I want to get healthy. Not just thin and skinny, but healthy. I want to be healthy in ALL aspects of my life; physically, mentally and spiritually. I keep feeling that God is pulling me in that direction. I know there are other, bigger plans that He has in store for me such as writing and women’s ministry. I cannot even begin to shepherd other women if I am not healthy myself.
So this year (I always seem to consider the start of school the “new year” rather than January 1) I have said NO to a lot of commitments. That is big for me. I am always the one that says yes without regards to my own family and well-being because “someone has to do it so it may as well be me.” This year, I am being somewhat selfish and going to focus on ME. I’m going to get healthy. I’m going to fill my pitcher up with the love and beauty of Jesus so that when He says it is time, I can go out and pour out to others.
The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus.
~1 Timothy 1:14~